So what has been happening???

It's early, and even though I have been nursing this sweet baby boy all night, it's a different kind of rest and I feel great and totally awake at 5am, what is that about?!?! So I am going to do a little posting to catch everyone up.

My mom was documenting through my labor and as the time got closer to have the baby she grabbed a camera and focused on documenting in that way. I plan to write my whole birth story in another post (probably in another week, depending on when I have time) but I wanted to get the quick details down now while the kids are sleeping. Sooooo, my labor pattern had been very weird and VERY spaced out all day, but my body hit a transition time around 2-3 am and my contractions really picked up. I felt like I was managing them pretty well, the water was amazing, Sheridan held my head and kept me focused, I repeated my GentleBirth affirmations and although many of the contractions were VERY strong, I was doing ok. I frequently checked for where the baby's head was and could tell that I still have a bag of water and the head was moving down. I got to the point where I could feel the head when I would stick my finger inside just about 2 inches. I knew we were getting closer to the time of pushing and that caused me moments of fear and hesitation. With Kylie and Cooper my body gave me a very clear "time to push" signal and it almost felt like my body would do it with or without me. But not this time. I had been mentally practicing "getting out of my own way" and letting my body do the work it was born to do, simply relaxing enough for my body to release my baby into the world. I honestly anticipated following my body's lead and when it was not leading me the way I thought it would, I had to get refocused.

I asked Karen to check me and give me some suggestions, she checked me and smiled, yep the baby is right there, just waiting. Karen suggested doing 1 second pushes with my next contractions, seeing if I could ease baby down a little more until I felt the strong urge to push. I was able to ease baby down a little more but not as well as I wanted. Karen offered to put her finger inside and give me some pressure to push into. That worked for a few contractions, I was able to hold on to Karen and focus on pushing and she directed. Karen got soaking wet and she helped me in the water, I am always amazed at the selfless way she gives to help women through birth, she is seriously amazing. She moved to giving me support by having me basically sit back into her hands so it felt like I had a chair to ground me while I pushed. That was very helpful too. A couple contractions in each position and the next suggestion was to stand and use gravity to help me push baby down. Standing scared me, I love the water, everything feels more manageable in the water, but I also knew she was right, I just didn't have enough power to move baby in the water until baby was a little lower and past my pubic bone. So I stood and pushed, it was scary but i could feel the progress. The head felt SO big, I could feel my insides trying to stretch, trying to accommodate. I knew once I got baby crowing I could get back down in the water and finish the delivery that way. This was the loudest part of my labor, I felt like I mentally lost it, I knew what I needed to do but was having a hard time just doing it. I had to dig deep and realize that the only was out was through, just as it is every time. I went for it, truly giving it my all and I could feel as baby's head moved down and started to stretch. The ring of fire, oh the ring of fire, I immediately dipped back into the water, tried to breath, but it still hurt so bad. Another push and the head was born, oh the relief, but the baby was so active, kicking me so hard, turning it's head, I could feel its shoulders adjusting, baby was ready to come and trying to help. I waited just a bit until my next urge and pushed out the shoulders and the rest just slipped out. I caught baby and got the cord untangled, it had been wrapped around neck or shoulder (hard to know), but in the water I got it undone. I slowly brought the baby up and was amazed at what had just happened, how hard it was and how all that pain was just gone! There was not any blood in the water, so I assumed there was no tear. I felt amazing just seconds after feeling like I was going split in half. Birth is so amazing like that.

As I brought the baby to my chest, Kylie came and stood by my side, Cooper (who had been sleeping on the floor in our bedroom, came crawling out and stood next to Craig, we all saw that he was a boy together, it was so sweet.

*the boys woke up so I stepped away*just realized I forgot to post it, posting this now, will continue to add later. I will try to be more brief, I guess I had more to say then I originally thought :) I'm sure that is not surprising to any of you ;)